Not surprisingly, COP OUT - the spanking new Bruce Willis buddy flick - succeeded in packing 'em in over the weekend.
Fans obviously pining for a blockbuster action/adventure to satiate their macho hunger for long drawn-out chase scenes, smash-ups, and a posse of nasty dudes to sneer at) were at the head of a line that snagged around the country at theatres near you.
But, upon closer scrutiny, a survey reflected that the ticket-holders this past weekend tended to be younger males bordering on a certain age range indicative of a genre that tends to appeal to virile ass-kicking middle-American male attitudes.
COP OUT is aptly titled - because it is just that - a cop out.
Well, for Bruce Willis, at least.
Here, he wisecracks, and - though long in the tooth (God he's turned into such a wrinkly old white dude) - manages to hop fences without breaking his neck, engage in fisticuffs with the best of 'em, and come up smelling roses instead of pushing up daisies.
Producers have chosen an old familiar formula this time around for the former Moonlighting star.
In fact, the script is so stale that it ends up being as crusty as Willis, who plays a rogue copy with a tendency to ignore the book (ho hum).
An African-American sidekick has been teamed alongside Willis's character, in a bold-faced effort to provide a dollop of comic relief when the script runs thin (which is quite often).
The pairing is somewhat reminiscent of a popular one in the Die Hard flicks (does a rolly-polly cop with a hunger for junk food ring any bells?).
The schtick worked then, so why not?
A few years ago, I worked on Die Hard II (if you look closely you'll spy me on the airplane that was later downed by the terrorists), so I have had the opportunity to catch Willis' approach to filmmaking up-close and personal.
The former megastar was pretty professional for the most part, though his stray eye was inclined to cause tongues to wag, when he tried to put the make on bit players and extras on the set.
Of course, those were pre-Demi (Moore) days.
Today, the aging Lothario has less hair - is hauling a few jello-bound pounds - and relies on his charm and sophistication (and a sly wink to the audience) to get through.
On this project, Willis obviously laughed all the way to the bank, 'cause the film has no artistic merit what-so-ever.
In a nutshell, it's a yawning big-budget studio disaster with tasty icing on top, guaranteed to get a lick or two in lowbrow markets around the heartland.
Nostalgic film buffs who pine for Willis' glory days may spring for a ticket if their dance card is full that weekend, too.
Once the initial opening night fever wears off, "Cop Out" will be relegated to the back burner where Willis will stew.
In the final analysis, if the lazy star doesn't stop resting on his laurels soon, he'll end up an industry joke in league with Sly, Arnold, and - God forbid - Stephen Siegel.
And, you thought Charlie Sheen had it bad!
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