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Sunday, October 25, 2009

West Hollywood Halloween Carnival (2009)...ghouls, faeries & blood-thirsty Vampires! Strip-light-fantastic...







A young femme Latino with a wild orchid arranged just behind his ear (with a pierced earring on the other) held up a see-through cape and draped over his body as he fluttered his eyelids a tad, and awaited approval from a male friend flipping through an odd-assortement of costumes at the CVS outlet.

Ah-ha!

West Hollywood's infamous Halloween Carnival must be creeping up on us.



On October 31st, as the sun slides into the ocean off the picturesque Pacific Coast, ghostly goblins and ghastly Drag Queens (with big hair, bigger boobs, and attitudes to match) will saunter down the blocked-off  boulevard to strut their sassy, sensual, svelte, sexy stuff.




I expect there will be a bevy of naughty hilarious impersonations of "John & Kate" (stinkers!) with kiddies in tow (is eight ever enough?) copied to the "t" ad nauseam throughout the night's festive proceeding, a butch batch of balloon boys, a smattering of Obamas with veiled Afghans grovelling at his side, a posse of self-righteous Mormons, and a baker's doze or two of buffed Vampires with botox lips, impeccable pumped-up pecs, and washboard abs ready to - um - suck the life out of you.

The annual Carnival sponsored by WeHo (we "whores"), is the extravagant soiree of the year, so there will be a hot time in the old gay gulch next week's end.

Hundreds of thousands of lookie-loo's will descend on the two-mile square "gay" City, in fact, and slurp the smorgasboard of sensory delights up!

Plenty to salivate over.

Half-naked bodies in wild seductive outfits, send-ups that will make 'ya grab for your videoCam, celebrities tripping the-light-fantastic with TMZ paparazzi at-the-ready up their rear, regular joes showing off their "packages", and a whole slew of chic party types hyped up & anxious to BOOGIE!

MTV has been known to label the blow-out the hippest event on the planet.

Sure, the curious may want to stroll up to Hollywood Blvd. (to Hollyweird) and catch the "breeders" do their thing - but, you know what? - the fags do it better!

Haven't a thing to wear?

Well, just stop in to Chi Chi LaRue's spanking new "porn" shop just a boa's length away from tony Robertson (@ Santa Monica Boulevard) and snatch up something bondage, something blue, something bizzare baby, too. 

Do!!!

In the alternative, hike up your skirt and trot your volumptuous a**  up to Hollywood & Vine. 

I spied a couple of dazzling feather headresses in a boutique window - that were so spectacular that a costume's not even a necessity - if you catch my drift.

Okay, 'ya need the ba**s  to pull it off, yessir!

Each year about two months before the big night, I swear up-and-down, that I'll pump up it up and take the plunge:

Stride down the strip in a gold jockstarp adorned with fluffy white electric wings!

Yup!

The old couch potato didn't make it off the lay-away plan. 

Next year, promise!

On the strip, there'll be a lot of wild dancin' and boozin', and costume contests galore with big buck prizes to boot.

I expect a posse of DJ's will be ensconced in nifty eye-catching tents decorated to the hilt with the macabre, to conjure of an after-midnight witchy mood to slap platters to.

How many times do you anticipate night prowlers hear the catch strains of Michael Jackson's hit-album "Thriller" - before the eve goes boo?

Of course, the parade of gay pride busting out all over the strip, won't be limited to the out-of-doors.

A gaggle of chic (and trashy!) soirees are waiting to seduce and entertain 'ya!

"Night of the Oink" (at the Eagle) promises to be a hoot with DJ  "Peter G" revving up a sweaty sexy storm!

Why the oink?

"Because men are pigs," guffawed the party planners.

Whoa Nellie!

At Ultra Suede (on Robertson) the "Super Duper Spooky Cherry Pop" might just do it for your bippie.

In fact, a lot of booty @ Ultra Seude & the Factory will be shakin' pop music.

And, get out - front-row-center - for a live performance with Agnes.

DJ Marco will be waiting with bated breath to let out a primal scream at the Abbey (Robertson) where I expect the party favors (and sizzling hottie male strippers) will be stepping stridently to the tune of the devilish living dead til the wee hours of dawn.

Farther down the strip - and up a left to Hollywood Boulevard - adventurous stray dogs may want to catch Fred & Jason's (the winsome killer duo) Halloweene gig.

Ooops!

Just checked the calendar. 

That scintillating bash - with DJ Manny Patel Jr. spinning in the Grand Ballroom and DJ Bryan Pfeifer jamming on the Roof  Deck in the Graveyead Lounge - comes to life on Friday the 30th.

Imagine that!

Two spectacular ghoulish nights to par-tay heartily at, eh?

Moi?

Just piecing together a knock-out costume for a grand entrance at dusk in the heart of Rainbow-ville.

So, get cracking (and cackling) because there are just 5 days to go before the scare of your life.

Haven't got a thing to wear?

If you're stuck for costume ideas, click on the links below to get a gander at a couple of easy throw-together outfits sure to get a nod of approval from your ghoul-friends, Madge.

One-eyed Pumpkin Beau

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKlNnkJtHRE

Wind-blown Witch with bondage fetish

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POtznaPer4w

Data Robot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9z_2pwnchxY

See 'ya there!!!






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