One of my favorite films is "The Lives of Others" which was helmed by Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck who won an Oscar for best foreign film for directing.
Once the coveted academy award was under his belt, Donnersmarck began to field scripts that started to flood in after that phenomenal success, or so the rumor goes.
After careful consideration, the European auteur gave the nod to "The Tourist" for his next project for some inexplicable reason.
Odd, when one considers that the script was poorly-written from the get-go!
If Donnersmarck was seeking to establish himself in the big leagues of Hollywood, the film - a critical miss - must have been an obvious choice (on the other hand).
Of course, the golden opportunity to work with two megastars - Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp - must have been the bait that cinched the deal.
When it comes to subject matter, it is obvious that the director didn't stray too far from his roots or familiar territory (the realms of intrigue, espionage, and surveillance) when scenes from "Lives of Others" (though more modest and realistic in scope in their context in the celebrated little flick) spring to the forefront of a film buff's mind.
With "The Tourist", Donnersmarck was able to facilitate a broader strokes on a wider lusher canvas with - in large part due to the backing of a major studio - which bootstrapped the director financially with the specific aim of launching a mainstream big-budget celluloid offering ripe for public consumption.
The plot is so unplausible that it is laughable.
Once the audience recognizes that, it is best they just settle in, and go along for the entertaining ride.
Angelina Jolie is in her element here in a role that exalts her classy sensual appeal to the max.
In fact, in the final analysis, Brad's wife may walk away from the Tourist - not only unharmed - but celebrated as one of the world's most beautiful women (a title that served screen legend Elizabeth Taylor well).
Think "Cleopatra".
I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers, that's for sure!
Though a fiasco - and a probable box-office-bomb - Donnersmarck's puff piece may end up catapulting Jolie onto a pedestal - where she'll become one of the untouchables - as far as celebrity and film greatness go.
Allegedly, the director held extensive production meetings with the wardrobe department, to get Jolie's "look" just right.
In addition, there was a big focus on light and make-up to ensure that the character's fashion sense (and style) were fleshed out so that her role of International Jet-Setter was believable.
My keen eye spied ghastly folds and creases in a "starring" couture piece in the opening scenes, though.
The "gown' was nothing more a thrown-together smock - draped miserably this way 'n that about her nubile figure - and lightyears away from any exquisite designer frock.
In one scene, when a camera pans in on Ms. Jolie's "butt" - so that actors portraying "agents" can get an up-close look at one of her striking assets - puckers and unsightly fabric snafus grabbed the spotlight instead of Jolie's celebrated "ass".
A red sash was totally out of place, as well.
But what really floored me were some shoddy production values which were totally unacceptable.
For instance, in the first scene where Angelina's character "speaks" on-camera, there is no volume to speak of; in fact, the dialogue sounds like a poorly edited "voice over".
Shortly thereafter, the problem resolved itself, so I have to speculate that after the film wrapped the scene needed a patch job in order to carry some weight at the beginning of the flick.
Unprofessional, to say the least!
For the most part, Jolie's scenes were as slick and and glossy as the expensive lipstick that adorned her luscious lips!
In contrast, Johnny Depp's face was pasty and puffy-looking, and out-of-place in a film where all the character's faces were animated and flush with color and vibrant good health.
Depp, in the final analysis, lacks the kind of - big-screen persona, male presence, and acting muscle = to pull this role off.
In fact, more often-than-not, Mr. Depp gets lost in the pricey furniture competing for the audience's attention.
On Dave Letterman recently, the actor blurted out that he hated his role on 21 Jump Street, a youth-oriented action-adventure series shot in Vancouver (Canada) years ago in the early days of his career.
In spite of that, the popular thespian managed to fit the "star vehicle" - and consequently - the show launched his career into the stratosphere.
"The Tourist" underscores how tenuous his future may be in the Hollywood genre produced here.
The film gets 3 stars for eye-candy!
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