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Showing posts with label The Ellen DeGeneres Show. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Ellen DeGeneres Show. Show all posts

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Ashton Kutcher...dethroned as King of Tweets! Audience goes wild on Ellen set...








The audience reaction when he stepped on stage - wild screams and applause that pierced the ears - that it caused Kutcher to quip:

"It would be great to have sex and have someone stand up and cheer like that," he joked.

"That does't happen now," Ellen quizzed.

"No, it doesn't," he almost mumbled.

Ellen chirped that she wouldn't be surprised if a bunch of folks from her audience would be willing to do that..

Kutcher sported a fluffy cut (Justin Bieber eat your heart out), exuded a boyish charm, and was oozing with sex appeal.

At a recent chi chi function, Kutcher wailed that he was put off by Sarah Palin.

For starters, he denounced her book as unprofound. arah Palin's.

 Allegedly, the former Ice Queen,  talked non-stop about the military and the "little people" which was a turn-off to Kutcher.

Although a fan of PRICE (who performed at the same high-profile event), he also expressed his frustration over the fact the Pop Idol rarely ever performed his hits - like Purple Rain - preferring to jam with the band for two (yawn) hours.

Ellen agreed with Demi's better-half.

"They don't like to sing the hits that we love them for," Ellen astutely noted.

Mr. Kutcher looked "sharp" in a tasteful tailored jacket, paired with dress slacks, thin black tie, and pristine white shirt with correctly knotted at the collar.

"So, you're King of the tweets," marvelled Ellen amid applause from the audience.

"I got dethroned," Ashton uttered up with a tinge of frustration in his voice.

Ellen probed a little further but came up empty-handed.

"I'd rather not talk about it."

So, they didn't.


Monday, May 24, 2010

Dancing with the Stars...the big 3 waltz to the finish! Glitzy (Mirror) ball within grasp...








The fashions (if that is what you'd call 'em) were fabulous darling (more flesh than flash on occasion), a celebrity Judge strutted his stuff weekly in the language of love, and talented choreographers spun out dazzling dance routines that wowed.

Sadly - the vastly Entertaining /Variety bill-of-fare - wraps tonight.

Like grand old lady, Dancing with Stars bows out gracefully.

If you caught last week's high-energy segment, the names of the contestants heading down the home stretch, will trip trillingly across the tongue.

Tonight,  dancers - Erin Andrews & Maksim Chmerkovskiy, Nicole Scherzinger &  Derek Hough, and Evan Lysacek & Anna Trebunskaya are going to compete for that great big glitter ball in the sky.

PEOPLE magazine will be there, too, to capture the evening's exciting festivities, for posterity sake, and to offer up a peek backstage where alot of the magic is first conjured up.

See 'ya there!


Monday, May 17, 2010

Justin Bieber...loves Japan! Moms are crazy...baby! baby! baby!






For a moment, I thought it was going to be a bad news day.

However, that assumption was tossed aside, when I flipped the channel on the old boob tube, and caught Justin Bieber in a cozy chat with perky talk show host Ellen DeGeneres.

There were quite a few juicy tibits for Bieber fans to gobble up!

How does the flavor of the month conjure up that ubiquitous  "do"?

"It's just perfect. How do you get it to look like that," Ellen probed, with nary a thought about possibly trampling on a touchy subject.

"I wash it. Blow dry it for five minutes. And, it just falls into place."

Ellen was quick to point out that "the look" may be an option for a few other celebrities.

So, she proceeded to have her staff flash publicity shots of - Robert Pattinson, Donald Trump, and Lady Gaga - sporting the mop-head look  on a wide screen overhead.

Hilarious!

At one point, Ellen - dressed in a red plaid shirt and brown vest which screamed out stuffy and boring - suddenly dangled a pair of scissors in his direction without warning.

"A lock of hair, Justin," Ellen teased as the audience roared in the background.

"No" the pop star cried out.

I half-expected him to cross two fingers in the shape of a cross  to ward her off.

For a moment - it appeared that Ellen was going to snatch a strand from the toy-boy - like it or not.

Justin must be wise to the fact that witches and gypsies often use a lock of hair to cast a spell on their subjects.

Smart move, Justin.

Surprisingly, Justin excitedly noted that Japan (where he returns next week for a gig)  is one of his favorite travel destination spots.

"Paris, London, Canada. They have a lot in common. But Japan is so different," he excitedly gushed.

Ellen quizzed him about privacy.

"Can you just go out?"

"Yup," he shrugged casually.

And, no, he doesn't wear disguises to slip through the adoring masses unnoticed.

"I go to malls when kids are in school."

A comment about the parents of fans triggered an interesting observation.

When Ellen wondered if Moms noticed the charismatic crooner in public,, there was a knee-jerk reaction.

"Mom's are crazy," he blurted out - at which point - gales of laughter rocked the room.

Allegedly, one aggressive mom dashed over to a school where he was appearing - to nab his autograph - and proceeded to engage in manic behaviour.

Although  her daughter didn't attend that facility, that wasn't going to curtail her hot pursuit of the sexy young teen.

Not satisfied with the coveted prize in hand, the slightly deranged woman followed him to his waiting vehicle, where she thrust a camera in his cherubic face and snapped away furiously..

Twilight fans would understand the phenomenon.

Curiously, Justin noted for the record, that he wasn't dating (in spite of the fact he's sweet 16 with a host of hormones raging through his compact little body).

Ellen had a bug in her ear, though, which she was inclined to pursue.

Just going out with people, huh?

"Just going out wth people," he echoed back with a cheshire smile on his face.

Well, the pop sensation certainly wasn't going to spill the beans on the Ellen Show.

No sir!

That didn't keep the perky hostess from enagaging in a little arm-twisting.

Like Miley Cyrus?

"Just going out," he chuckled, as a shot of Justin and Miley sprang to life on a screen overehead.

"With Miley Cyrus," Ellen persisted.

Finally, Justin relented a tad.

"Miley Cyrus and people," he smiled smugly.

Ellen's probe should have gone in another - more practical - direction.

A little feedback on the kind of  babe (or dude)  he's  into would have been helpful, Ellen!

Justin was caught clubbing with one of the Kerdashian girls (which some thought amounted to cradle robbing on her part) one starry night.

But, For the most part, the kid runs the gauntlet alone (or with his brother occasionally at his side).

Yup!

There are two mop heads  in the Bieber family.

Maybe they could double-date?

Finally, the moment die-hard fans were  p**ing their pants in anticipation over, arrived.

The chart-topper dashed on stage and crooned his best-selling hit.

On the rail, in the studio audience, a bevy of bodacious babes screamed wildly as Justin gyrated on stage, in a slick choreographed routine, with attractive back up dancers urging him on.

Mesmerizing!

Just one thing, though, as Columbo would say.

Justin, you should't shake your booty into camera. 

For some inexplicable reason, your butt doesn't translate well (not very sexy) on camera.

Maybe you need to squeeze into tight  jeans - with a dollop of spandex factored in - to set it off just right.

Take a cue from the leader singer of Cold Play!



Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Dave Letterman...catches twitter rage! Newbie notes lesbo Ellen boasts 4 mil followers...






Life is tweet!




Dave Letterman stepped out of the dark ages last night and crafted his first tweet!

A few seconds shy of the momentous event, the toothy talk show host - like a kid with a new toy (or an old letch with a hot new babe) - rambled off a handful of statistics with elation.

"Oprah gets three million tweets," he excitedly pointed out to his rapt audience.

PC savvy bandleader Paul Shaffer was inclined to toss in a comment from the sidelines at this juncture.

"Followers, Dave. Not tweets."

The scandal-ridden late show personality was a bit confused about the semantics of the ongoing twitter trends floating internet surfers'  boats around the globe.

Amused, Dave corrected himself.

"And it says here," Dave interjected with glee, "that Ellen DeGeneres has four million."

There were some oohs and aahs from the audience


"But," Dave chuckled,"I expect most of those are lesbians, so it probably doesn't count."

The audience howled.

Dave giggled for being so naughty.


Since Ellen and her fans follow moi, I'll tweet this little update on Dave, so they'll be sure to get their t**s all-a-twitter over the less-than-tweet comment Dave uttered at the witching hour last night.

Surprsingly, the Dave Letterman show could only boast a paltry three thousand "followers", according to Letterman, who was surprisingly mum on the Tiger Woods dilemma.

"That's because people don't know you tweet, Dave," Shaffer comforted him from his lofty perch on the sideliness off-stage.

Also, birds of a feathe, tweet together, I surmise (in private and away from the likes of facebook friends who press their ears close to the wall, I expect).

With a bit of fanfare, a staffer plunked a computer down in front of Dave, and strolled off.

"They've brought me this twitter machine so I can tweet," Dave mischievously pointed out to his die-hard fans hanging on every word.

"That's a lap top computer, Dave," the bandleader pointed out.

The virgin tweetie was a bundle of nervous energy and raring to boldly twitter where none of the Letterman clan had ever ventured tweetly before.

As Dave started to key in a word or two, Schaffer was about to interrupt again, when Dave shooed him off.

"Paul, please. I'm doing something here."

A second after he turned back to the keyboard, he whirled around - gazed into camera with a schoolboy's expression of joy and wonder on his face - and noted some important information to be mindful of.

"Oh, you can only use 140 characters, too. So, if there is an emergency or something, forget it."

Once Dave managed to key in a tweet, he was in a quandry about how to proceed.

"What now?"

A handfulf of knowledgeable tweeters in the studio instructed Dave to hit enter.

Once done, he was a bit perplexed.

"Well, did it go," he wondered aloud in so many words.

Apparently Dave failed to strike the update button, but - once done - the twitter newbie proudly learned his tantalizing message was "received".

What were the first words spoken - and sent whizzing across the blogosphere - at the twitter site?

"Do you smell fried peppers and veal?"

"I thought I smelled fried peppers and veal just as I was about to tweet," Dave dead-panned to the camera.

I expect there will be a few hilarious replies this morning from Dave's followers.

In fact, now that Dave is a celebrated twitter aficiando, I expect his number of follows will leap.

I just signed on "to follow" Dave for curiosity sake.

Just how good a speller do 'ya think Dave is, after all?

News at 11!





Dave doubles-up guests in chairs for maximum ratings potential!


Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Ellen DeGeneres...play nosedive & win a Nokia mobile phone!



Ellen's Thursday show (tomorrow) looks like a blast!

In the spirit of games, Ellen DeGeneres will ask audience members to play Norwegian Nosedive, which requires participants to touch their body parts to the floor.

As usual, viewers at home - who tweet - have the opportunity to win a daily prize if they can correctly answer a question which focuses on a part of the broadcast (a guest's response, a discussion about a particular subject, a bit of trivia Ellen mentions casually, etc.).

On Friday, Ellen chats with world’s fastest Sport Stacker, a precocious kid named by the name of Steven Purugganan.

On that show, the funny-lady will try her velvety-smooth hands at cup stacking.

Psst!

Don't tell Ellen I blabbed, but balancing skills have nothing to do with it!

It's all done with Elmer's glue.

Needless to say, it's all a fun way to - "Beat the Heat" - according to the perky talk-show hostess-with-the-mostest!

Later, Ellen!



Monday, July 6, 2009

Ellen DeGeneres...Prince! George Clooney! Drew Barrymore! Knock-out week for guests!




Wow!

Ellen's e-mail announcing her line-up of guests this week (July 6th/10th) sure packed a wallop.

Monday, Patrick Dempsey is expected to touch down on her couch and discuss his new cologne PLUS!

According to that latent homo cutie on TMZ ('ya know! the one with the long silky surfer dude "do" who's got a thing about dudes showing their "business" in public) Dempsey has one of the best a**es in Tinseltown.

Backed up with a video clip, folks!



Tomorrow, Ellen Generous (my nickname for the hostess-with-the mostest who gives away sweet tweets - um - treats on her top-rated show daily) will chat up perky cutie Drew Barrymore who sticks up for "Gay Moms".

Check out my video of Drew who turned out to support a repeal on Prop 8 in WeHo:


On Wednesday (July 8th) PRINCE will prance onto the stage and no doubt bring down the Ellen house when he breaks a personal-best recluse record for rarely making appearances on lowly talk shows.

That little charmer, Ellen, probably soft-soaped him outta the wings by gifting him with silky purple undershorts (she has a thing about guys underthings, 'ya know?) a matching "T" and feather boa, I expect.

Lindsay Lohan will cry the blues - same show! - about being alone.
Potential hook-ups should snatch up a ticket and make a pass when she saunters into the mostly-lesbo audience with Ellen to do what has become the quirky comedienne's ritual dance (the one thing that manages to always irk Howard Stern when nothing else does).




Georgie Baby (Clooney, who else?) will saunter in on Thursday all suave and debonair.
The handsome hunk has something in common with me, 'ya know?

Figured you would make that boner - get your mind out of the gutter folks!


Actually, "G" and I share the same birthday - May 6th - along with Rudolph Valentino (no wonder I always fantasize about being a silent film star) Willie Maes (I couldn't get a ball across the home plate for spit) Sigmund Freud (wet dreams are all about sex, noted old Sig, and I couldn't agree more) and Orson Welles.

Say, has anyone noticed the subtle blooper in the celebrated film - Citizen Kane - which has been touted as the "perfect" movie offering of all time?

Betcha can't!

Finally (thank God it's Friday) Hugh Jackman (Wolverine) will grace the Ellen stage with his studly self and cause a few straight gals (and dudes) in the footlights to swoon a tad.

For kicks, maybe Ellen & Hugh will perform an old Peter Allen tune?

Stay tuned!