Bring back the stylish dame!
Occasionally, I pop into a 711 at the corner of Holloway & La Cienega to pick up the morning paper and snatch up a cup of Java.
Unfortunately, in recent weeks, management there has hired a female (?) cashier with an obvious personality disorder.
Strolling in to shop there now is quite an uncomfortable experience.
Of course, one has only to take a gander at the screwball character, to fathom what her problem is!
The poor little misfit is overweight, for starters.
Worse than that, she has no fashion sense or even a smidgen of self-awareness.
After botching a dye job, for some inexplicable reason, the twenty-something (I'm being kind) non-entity chose to sculpt the mish-mash of yucky orange-yellow-green freakish strands into a little pyramid on top.
Does she honestly take a glance in the mirror each morning and imagine that she looks the least bit cool or attractive?
Today, she appeared to have a fixation on me.
When I strode towards the coffee counter, she stopped in her tracks, blocked my path, and stared at me.
Nope, she wouldn't get out of the way.
So creepy, it made my skin crawl!
When I side-stepped her to let her pass, she copied my action to a "t", and remained standing "this-close" to the left of me.
Kookoo, eh?
Her weirdness walked off to another section of the store, but within secs, was back at my side paying attention to every minute detail as I added cream, stirred the piping-hot liquid into a tasty blend, then crowned the disposable cup with a lid.
She followed in unison as I trekked over to the cash register - albeit in line behind the display case - then stood there at the check-out looking for-all-the-world like an empty-headed zombie.
Now, I understand why well-known celebrities go up-the-wall when they experience the same kind of bizarre conduct from strangers running rampant all around 'em in the streets, when they're dining at a trendy restaurant, or out on a shopping spree on Robertson.
These weirdos need to get a life!
I wanted to advise the woman, who had all the personality and charm of a worm, that her behaviour was odd.
"Maybe you should get some therapy," I imagined myself saying in a straight-forward heart-to-heart.
But, my spiritual teachings urge compassion.
So, I smiled politely, said a little prayer for her, and exited politely.
Needless to say, I won't be patronizing that convenience store again.
If she is mentally imbalanced, I certainly don't want to encourage her.
Henry Miller said it best:"There is no salvation in becoming adapted to a world (or person?) which is crazy."
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