I chuckled when I came across a notice in a New York newspaper inviting patrons of the local libraries to submit an essay touting a librarian worthy of recognition for their dedicated service to the public.
Well, maybe the staff at Libraries in the "Big Apple" still go that extra "distance" to lend a hand to patrons, but in Los Angeles it is quite rare.
Do you recall the stereo-typical image of the librarian that was perpetuated in the old musical - The Music Man - starring Robert Preston?
Marion was all sweetness and light!
Well, it appears to be all myth.
Step into a library in Los Angeles and you'll encounter a sour old puss - reluctant to get out of her comfy chair - or offer any assistance.
True, the shelf-stuffers are not all "old", necessarily.
A few young upstarts have weaseled their way into the libraries around the lower mainland - but they're too busy polishing their nails and gossiping with their co-workers as they sit on wide fleshy butts - to be of help to anyone.
Two libraries in particular - the one in Beverly Hills and another on Hope Street downtown - are particularly bad for that.
Although these lay-abouts haven't a Master's degree - or even a Bachelor-of-whatever - the dolts are under the false impression that because they're installed at a counter in a lowly periodical section they are full-fledged librarians.
Fat chance!
On occasion, the employee conduct is downright shocking, too.
The other day it was quite disturbing to encounter the blatant incompetence (and bad attitude) of one young male librarian - yes, Marion is often a fella now-a-days - by the name of Ian Rosen (West Los Angeles Library) whose lackadaisical manner was appalling.
At that branch there are a handful of computers that are available for patrons to use in an "Express" capacity.
Instead of signing on with a library card for an extended period of time - the quick-use PC's are available for fifteen minutes a shot - so that visitors to the area (tourists, shoppers, etc.) may check e-mail on-the-go or search info quickly to undertake tasks at hand.
When the fifteen minutes is over - the screen turns blood red - signaling the session has expired. At this juncture, patrons are required to upseat themselves and allow the next person in line to have their turn.
On this particular day - a teen about fourteen years of age - was playing a few games on the computer when his time elapsed.
Although there were patrons waiting - the self-indulgent overweight lad - waited 'til the red screen faded to blue; then, started up a new session with no regard for the other patrons who were patiently waiting for their turn.
Understandably, a patron complained to the librarian at the front desk.
Although the male staffer was a few feet from Mr. Rosen (who was sitting at a desk across the way) he chose to pick up the phone, dial a number, and rustle up Rosen on the other end that way.
He whispered behind a cupped hand that there was a complaint about a patron over-staying his designated time slot on the PC.
Mr. Rosen said "OK", hung up, and then glanced around the room with an odd-ball expression on his face.
He appeared to be uncertain about something and definitely in a quandary.
Frankly, it didn't appear that he was in full possession of his faculties, if you ask me.
After he got a couple of dirty looks from the complainant, Rosen proceeded to rise up from his desk in a disheveled fashion, then strolled behind the computer in question to take a gander at the young man's screen.
At this point, he did a sort-of spastic-like walk back to his desk.
Then, he plunked down in his seat, without accomplishing a thing!
When patrons cocked their heads at each other this way 'n that - and wondered amongst each other what his problem was - he struggled to his feet again.
Again, Rosen cruised by the computer - took a glimpse at the screen on the PC - and did nothing!
Finally, the offending young man got up - after about three successive fifteen-minute sessions were under his belt - and left.
Mr. Rosen demonstrated that day - that he was not only incompetent - but ineffectual in his job, too.
What is the purpose of a monitor at the library, after all?
Mr. Rosen, if you don't know, look the word up in a dictionary.
Golly, there are a heap-load of 'em around 'ya to take a boo at, after all!
Mr Rosen, should have strode over to the patron who was violating the rules - informed him of the complaint - then turfed him from the PC he was hogging to the detriment of other patrons who had a right to access, too.
Instead, the loser did nothing! Jack sh**.
Notwithstanding, in one fell swoop, Rosen managed to lead the young man down the wrong path.
By failing to take action - the scatter-brained staffer essentially impressed upon the ignorant lad - that it was "okay" to break the rules.
And, more importantly, he signalled by his irresponsible (thoughtless) actions, that there is "no" honor in respecting the rights of others.
Mr.Rosen should be let go.
If he can't carry out his duties - or doesn't want to for some inexplicable reason - the Library should ask that he turn in his library card, please.
After all - there are a number of qualified unemployed people in the work force - who would thank their lucky stars to have a secure job like his at the local library.
In these difficult financial times, the local library can ill afford to waste funds on some bump on a log with all the personality and gumption of a worm.
But, the stupidity of Librarians does not end there.
The other day at the UCLA campus, one female employee there demonstrated that she must have an IQ of about 2.
During the course of the day - a student moved a lightweight armchair from one section of the library over to the computer banks - since the small stools there offered up little comfort.
Yes - either the library staff know nothing about proper posture - or don't care if the students have proper seating facilities as they nurture their brains.
Anyhoo - when the individual finished up with their assignment on the PC - they up and went to parts unknown.
On the heels of their departure - another student innocently happened along - saw the empty armchair and slipped into it with nary a thought.
A librarian proceeded to saunter by and utter a comment that inferred the young man had absconded with the chair from the reference area - and by the tone of her voice - suggested that such an act was forbidden somehow.
When the student noted that the chair was there when he sat down - and summarily offered to release it to her - she responded defensively.
"No. Use it. But put it back when you're done."
Say what?
Why should the dude return a chair to an area he never took it from?
Actually, the librarian was wrong on both counts.
First, she should have checked her facts first - and not assumed off-the-bat that the innocent lad was the culprit who maneuvered the dastardly deed without permission (all this over a lousy chair?).
Secondly, the strident prickly woman was out-of-line to demand that the student return it to another section of the library where it was allegedly taken from.
Not wanting to cause trouble, though, the student proceeded to return the chair to the reference area to appease the librarian.
However, when he did so, three librarians proceeded to stare at the thoughtful student as if he were mad.
Sensing their confusion, he offered up an explanation.
"Someone moved this chair earlier. Since I was sitting in it, the Librarian asked me to return it to this area when I was done," he noted matter-of-fact.
Guess what?
The librarians were at a loss to fathom where to put the chair!
"Oh, put it over there," one agitated desk employee finally directed.
Talk about idiocy.
Imagine that!
These stupid individuals are actually running this fountain of knowledge!
The blind leading the blind, I guess.
Libraries and their gate-keepers used to be respected symbols of wisdom and knowledge.
Now, they're a sorry joke to contend with whenever you enter the premises.
Gives us a break, New York.
Transfer out some of the high caliber employees you intend to give plaudits to, and save our local libraries in Los Angeles from a terrible fate, here on the uncultured West Coast.
