CVS..."Rewards Coupon" offer needs overhaul says LA TIMES columnst! I agree!

Normally, I am the one that is on the rag about questionable business practices at retail outlets I frequent.

So, it was refreshing to flip open a page in the Los Angeles Times bright-and-early the other morning, and stumble across one columnist's criticism of the "Rewards Coupon" offer at CVS.

In his rant, David Lazarus started off by noting that last year - when he voiced his concerns about the way the coupon offer was being handled - management misrepresented the facts to get him off their back.

For instance, when the journalist complained that the coupons received currently at the cashier were cumbersome and difficult to use in a practical way, the representative he spoke to at CVS assured him the coupons would be automatically calculated on the shopper's rewards card in the near future so the consumer wouldn't have to keep track.

I agree with Mr. Lazarus that the ticker-style coupons are - not only difficult to "stow away" in a wallet - but an indecent waste of paper (I'm an environmentalist, after all).

But, when the reporter followed up recently with a phone call to determine what progress was being made - Lazarus not only got the run-around - but a different take on the issue by another "suit" in management.

Go figure!

In the past, I have reported my own run-ins with staff at CVS, and the fraudulent deceptive way they often conduct their business enterprise daily, at outlets all around California.

In fact, I published one post in which I noted that the Department of Consumer Affairs actually took legal action against CVS, to curb their illegal conduct which was in direct violation of consumer rights.

Post: 08/31/2009

http://ijulian.blogspot.com/2009/08/cvsretailer-dishonest-about-sale-offers.html

So, the drama persists with CVS.

Obviously, management doen't care at this point what their customers (or the government) thinks.

That's what happens when a retailer becomes a giant in the industry.

The "Davids" are few-and far-between; subsequently, if it weren't for folks like Mr. Lazarus and moi - CVS would undoubtedly get away with murder.

And, mounds of ill-gotten gains, in the process.

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz

CVS Pharmacy...irate workers picket San Francisco outlet on Market Street! Non-Union dispute!



A rag-tag band of workers braved the nasty torrential rains bright-and-early this morning to get vocal about the hiring of non-union workers at CVS outlets in the San Francisco area.

Strikers waved crudely-drawn signs urging shoppers not to patronize the CVS pharmacies because of the company's policy to employ scab employees!

Right on!

In these tough economic times, workers are in dire need of the kind of protection that Unions are capable of negotiating, on their behalf.

Will the trend sweep out across the country?

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz



Sign of the times?

CVS...never throw pearls before swine! One for the celebs...

Drive thru looks promising to avoid contact with ornery cashiers!

If any of the locals in WeHo have ever trotted into CVS @ the corner of La Cienega and Santa Monica Blvd (where the old roller-skating-rink partly owned by Cher once stood) they've  probably crossed paths with a dim-witted clerk who appears to have either thrown back a shot or two - or just maybe - gobbled up some mind-bending drugs on her break.

Honestly!

Whenever I am in line to purchase a few items, and I end up at her cash register, it never ceases to amaze me how difficult it is for this middle-aged African-American woman to shift into gear when the next customer strolls up!

For a moment or two, she stares at me with this glassy-eyed look (somewhat reminiscent of one you might expect from someone with poop accidentally running down their pant leg).

Then, she continues to give me the hairy eyeball, as she strains forward - plucks the items up - and proceeds to scan 'em.

In the meantine, she continues to stare at me like I am a creature from outer-space!

Gosh!

This woman is slower than molasses in January!

The lights are on, but nobody's home.

One day, her laziness - and outright refusal to carry out her duties as a cashier - forced me to conjure up a way to handle this incompetent woman (with all the personality of a slug) in future sojourns to the store.

For instance, one day - when I strode up to pay for a few items - I politely asked the old grouch to verify the price.

As you are no doubt aware, CVS is a disreputable pharmacy, that engages in deceitful deceptive business practies and false advertising.

A few months ago, I noted for the record, that on several occasions CVS tried to overcharge me for items that were supposed to be on sale.

For this reason, I posted an alert on my blog to warn consumers about their dishonesty.

Post:  08/31/09

http://ijulian.blogspot.com/2009/08/cvsretailer-dishonest-about-sale-offers.html

Shortly after that post was published, it was announced that a Government Agency (The Department of Consumer Affairs) was investigating CVS for the reasons I aforementioned (in addition to selling expired products).

So, in view of this, I double-check the price of an item on sale to make sure it is accurate.

When I asked this broken-down-excuse for a human being to check the price, without batting-an-eye, she instructed me to check it myself at the "price checker" on the other side of the pharmacy.

Huh?

Did she honestly think that CVS hired her to stand around and look "ugly" on her shift all  day?

Aren't price checks part of a cashier's duties?

At this juncture, I politely informed her to go ahead and scan the item, because I didn't have anymore  time to waste.

If the item didn't ring up correctly, I would have requested that she issue the credit back, which would have ended up being be a long-involved transaction process (sure to frustrate the heck out of her).

So, how do you like them apples, lady?

Yeah, life's a bitch, then 'ya die.

Afer that incident, I made a decision to avoid contact with her altogether in the future.

For example, when I was in line yesterday to pay for a pair of socks - and her register was available first - I politely turned to the fellow behind me and told him he was welcome to go ahead of me.

It didn't escape my attention, though, that customers behind started to whisper about what went down..

No, I wasn't be rude (or discriminatory).

I was simply exercising my right to avoid contact with an individual who has demonstrated to me continually in the past that any interaction will always be a negative experience which I am entitled to be free of.

Why should I bless that person with my presence, anyway?

The Lord was quite specific about such matters in the scriptures:

"Never throw pearls before swine!"

Amen!

Footnote

Workers in the service industry have a history of putting down the alleged rude or impolite behaviour of celebrities when they cross paths with them - in restaurants and nightclubs, for instance - so I have turned the tables and thrown a spotlight on their inappropriate conduct and lack of manners. 

One for the celebs, eh?

Caution slugs ahead at CVS!

http://www.thetattler.biz

Walgreens...CVS & Safeway el cheapo outfits! Bag, please...

If you've sauntered into CVS, Walgreens, Pavillions or Safeway in recent days, you’ve probably noticed an alarming low-class trend.

After the cashier has rung up the items and collected the cash - instead of neatly packing the purchases in a bag with a store logo etched on the face - the ill-mannered clerks snarl at the shopper.

“Do you want a bag?”

Huh?

Personally, I’m not a magic act - and thus - not inclined to hanker up to the idea of juggling three or four bulky objects in my bare hands as I head out the front door and down the street to my waiting vehicle.

Especially when you consider that some dim-witted security guard with half a brain will give me (and other shoppers) the once-over if they spy us waltzing out the door without a bag and receipt in hand.

As far as I’m concerned, if the stores in question need to scrimp on shopping bags, they shouldn’t be in business.

If I am forced to interact with the morons they install at the counter to handle the simple transactions, the least they can do is provide a bag to make the whole process a little more consumer friendly.

These el cheapo outfits are not only a shopper’s nightmare, but a disgrace to the community at large.

The self-serve automated check-outs are looking better each day!

http://www.thetattler.biz

Pavilions...sale scam! Nepotism unfair to work applicants...

A few weeks ago, I penned a consumer alert on CVS, to warn about their deceptive business practices.

For example, the coprorate giant advertised sales on the shelves in their retail outlets, which were not honored at the cash register at check out.

For consumers who were expecting a discount, it amounted to one big rip-off!

Until CVS got caught, that is.

Shortly after a lawsuit was filed for damages, CVS settled the charges out-of-court without admitting fault.

But, weeks later, I also became victim of their dishonest attempt to lure customers into buying items on the premise they were on sale, when - in fact - CVS did not intend to honor the advertised sale price.

After my own consumer alert was published on the Internet, a government agency also stepped in and began an investigation into the deceptive business practices at the pharmacy.

Now, it appears that Pavilions has also jumped on the dishonest bandwagon.

The other morning, for instance, I was standing in line at he check-out counter, when I witnessed an exchange between a customer and a clerk which turned out to be an eye-opening experience.

For example, at least four items on sale, were not properly charged to the shopper.

In fact, if the middle-aged man was not on top of things, he probably would have been overcharged for the goods and never been the wiser.

A pie advertised at $5.99 was rung up at $7.99, for instance.

Because the Pavilion's clerk wouldn't accept his word for it - I was forced to wait in line along with the disgruntled man - until a box girl dashed back and verified the advertised sale price.

When corrections were made, it turns out Pavilions would have charged the hapless neighborhood resident about five or six dollars in excess of the sum actually due!

Needless to say, I paid attention when I sauntered up to have my groceries tabulated.

Shortly after my purchases were bagged up, I strode over to the Starbuck's outlet at the streetside of the spacious newly-renovated Pavilion's supermarket, for a cup of Earl Grey tea.

As I sat there, savoring the tasty hot beverage, a bit of the conversation going down around me fell on my alert ears.

Judging from what I overheard from employees on a break, Pavilions also appears to engage in other questionable practices which are downright disturbing.

It was revealed that day that several of the workers at Pavilions have relatives in gainful employment there, too.

From an ethical point of view, it's a highly irregular practise, for sure.

When the store first opened weeks ago, and a call went out for employees, were candidates hired based on their skills and overrall experience (and a resume verifying a work history), or did management hire based on nepotism?

If relatives got a priority nod, that was hardly fair to outsiders who applied, wouldn't you agree?

From a practical point of view, nepotism is not politically correct in the workplace, either.

If there was ever a question about  productivity (alleged theft, whatever) levelled at a worker - common sense dictates - the relatives would vouch for (and protect) their own!

Along the same lines of thinking, it should be obvious that if an unhappy shopper lodged a complaint against an employee - for being rude or unprofessional - it is doubtful that the relatives on the sidelines would make good independent witnesses.

In a nutshell, an  incestuous workplace like that, is trouble waiting to happen!

While I am on the subject of Pavilions, I have to note for the record, that a couple of racist African-American security guards are continuing to annoy and intimidate a few of the white shoppers.

That's what happens when you bring in uneducated workers from the struggling lower class (brimming with resentment  towards privileged whites) - outfit them in a security guard's uniform - and bestow upon them  a little authority they can't handle.

Managers at Pavilions need their heads examined!

They sure haven't been thinking straight.

Or, perhaps those unanswered complaints to the executive offices, say it all.

Pavilions doesn't give a damn!

http://www.julianayrs.com

CVS...retailer dishonest about sale offers! Staff rude & insulting...

Get ripped off 27/7 at CVS!

One day I trekked down to my regular pharmacy and got a rude awakening.

Much to my chagrin, the corporate giant that runs CVS gobbled up the retail outlet I was loyal to, without so much as a:

"Wham-bam!  Thank you man!"

Like Wal-Mart before it, a CVS invasion into the mainstream marketplace has been making waves across the country .

For the most part, the reaction of consumers has been negative.

Outside one outlet  in Westwood, for example, a posse of activists scrambled to coral  customers as they exited the thriving enterprise with the specific aim of rustling up signatures for a petition seeking to trigger action against CVS (and their evil empire) for allegedly selling confidential medical information gleened from pharmacy records in violation of consumer rights.

Although a lawsuit was also filed against CVS in recent months for allegedly selling expired products on the shelves which posed a potential threat to customers' overall health and well-being (which was quickly settled out-of-court in spite of the fact CVS execs insistered there was no wrong-doing on their part) CVS management has continued to engage in dishonest conduct which may be ripe for litigation, too.

Shopppers have complained to consumer advocates - that after they plucked up sale items from the well-stocked shelves to take advantage of the savings - the original price was charged at the cash register instead of the discounted one advertised.

This past weekend, for instance, I spied two sales I was inclined to act upon.

One, offered regular-size chocolate bars (normally 89 cents each) at the yummy price of two for-a-buck.

Also, ten bottles of vitamin water (which normally retail at $1.69 each) were being offered for a sawbuck.

If  that paper-money jargon has you baffled, just quiz an old-timer at the market for the answer.

Uh-huh!

Ten bucks.

With bargains in hand, I stepped up to the rough 'n tumble line (CVS has the WORST check out system in retail chain hell. The bozo who designed the sucker must have had sh** for brains) snaking down an aisle to await my turn.

The first two items (candy bar snacks) didn't pass muster!

"This one is $1.59," the clerk smirked at me.

I motioned to the counter below where the price (the one I correctly quoted) screamed out in bold black type from a brilliant yellow tag.

"Well, it's a mistake," he responded rudely.

At this juncture, I heard a couple of snickers (no pun intended) from a couple of customers behind me,  who were starting to shift from one leg to another impatiently.

I thought I'd give him the benefit of the doubt, set them aside, and motioned for him to ring up the remaining item.

When he announced the total, I stared back in disbelief.

Something was amiss.

After scannning the receipt, I spied the error right off-the-bat. 

Instead of charging me $1.00 for the Vitmain water, he inputted the sum of $1.99.

When I pointed out the overcharge, he got annoyed with me.

Apparently, a celebrated athlete was tied into a special promotion for the same thirst-quencher.

But, if I recalled correctly, that special was not advertised in the glass refrigerator at the back of the store.

So, I trotted down the aisle and verified that the sale price I was referring to was correct - at which point - I called out for him to check the sale price for himself.

In response, one of his co-workers strode up and took a glance at the offending tag, then retorted:

"We have two sales. You were charged for the other one."

"Well, I want the one that was advertised here," I firmly underscored without batting-an-eye.

Frustrated by the confrontation - and obviously not intelligent or experienced enough to fathom how to resolve the dilemma - he suddenly contradicted himself.

"That sale ended today,"  he replied smugly.

 "So there! Gotcha," he appeared to be saying.

"Sir," (I used the term loosely - after all - he was a seriously overweight twenty-something kid with a spiteful unprofessional attitude) "the law requires that you sell me the item for the avertised price".

Oh, did that get his goat!

To shake things up a bit, I thought I'd throw a little scare in his direction.

"CVS just settled a lawsuit for violating consumer laws. Do you want to be sued again?"

His jaw dropped.

Meanwhile, the line at the counter was bloating-up by the minute.

Boy, were the natives getting  pi**ed.

Suddenly, the little dough-boy yelled out to the cashier in an exasperated tone.

"Give it to him for a buck."

The cashier rang up the charges, I paid, and that was that.

When I headed out the door, I was absolutely floored when I overheard a nasty remark the disgruntled CVS worker uttered up to his co-worke behind my back.

"Because of that a**hole, I have to change all the price tags!"

Well, that was it in a nutshell, wasn't it?

Or, was it?

Why didn't CVS Management instruct staff to strike sale tags as soon as the goods were no longer available at bargain prices?

CVS's failure to inform employees about consumer laws was highly suspicious, too.

After all, pricing errors on advertised sales should be honored without question.

In the case of CVS, it appears that the company is relying on employee igornance (and their failure to disclose) to get them out of a "fix" when they are caught red-handed fudging on sales items to rack up profit.

I was also miffed at the failure of CVS staff to recognize the repercussions of their reprehensible unprofessional conduct, which interrupted the natural flow of things.

For example,when a customer snaps up a sale item and there is an obvious error in price, the clerk is forced to void the charge, then re-calculate the totals, and-so-forth and-so-on (with obvious delays).

In that event - in addition to the purchaser - the customers in line behind are also forced to deal with the frustrations involved, as well.

On the morning in question - boy! - did I face their ire.

The snafu wasn't my fault, but judging from the nasty glances in my direction, you'd think so.

Heck, I just wanted CVS to honor the sale price without having to twist an arm or two.

Fat chance!

Suddenly, something dawned on me today, as I was penning this post.

What does CVS stand for?

It's a secret code, a get-out-of-jail free card, used frequently at the Evil Empire.

Can't Vouch (for) Sale.

http://www.julianayrs.com/

Spanish...language creeps into the American mainstream @ CVS! Si...

On the heels of tabulating the goodies I snapped up at CVS the other morning, a perky cashier instructed me to input my pin on the ATM machine, select the cash-back option, and what-have-you.

Shortly after I keyed in my ultra-secret 4 digit code in a clandestine fashion, the ATM machine continued on, and screamed out a second personal directive to me from the miniature screen resting at my nimble fingertips below.

"Do you want cash back?"

When I scrutinized the response options offered up, I was slightly taken aback.

There should have been two entries to choose from, right?

"Yes" or "No".

I suppose I'd better put my specs on, I muttered to myself.

If I was not mistaken, there appeared to be 3 (!) distinct choices staring smack dab at me!

Uh-huh!

And, what was the 3rd word etched in line right below the "yes" option.

Si!

I hesitated.

I mean, what the heck?

Was this a prankster's idea of an off-the-wall joke?

Or - the first "baby step" towards surreptitiously introducing "Spanish" as a "second" language - into the mainstream around the country?

Suddenly, a quote from William Drayton sprang to mind:

"Change starts when someone sees the next step."

http://www.julianayrs.com

CVS...hats & sunglasses off! Are they kidding?

Management at CVS (at a Las Vegas outlet) must have a few screws loose if they expect consumers to abide by one of their new house rules.

Imagine that, when I strolled up to the automatic door at the front entrance, I spied a sign haphazardly tacked up with a bit of scotch tape, requesting that customers remove their hats and sunglasses before entering the store for security reasons.

What a bizarre notion!

If you're like me, when I don a cap and pull it down squarely over my face, it usually means I'm having a bad-hair day.

Until each luscious strand has been properly washed and shampooed and painstakingly coiffed - no matter what CVS says - my "do" is not going to be unveiled in the harsh light of day.

To avoid close scrutiny, women often hide their plain-Jane faces under a stylish swirl of hats and sunglasses, when they alight outside into the cold cruel world sans make-up to carry out mundane chores throughout the day.

Does CVS honestly think that a customer (in particular a high-profile celebrity hotly-pursued by the breathless paparazzi) will kow-tow to their ludicrous demands if a low-quality security camera is going to snap away in their already-pasty face?

Over our split-ends and dehydrated skin!

http://www.julianayrs.com

CVS...free bucks & great discounts!

If you're like I used to be, you probably plop down your purchases on the counter, pull out your worn wallet, and wait to pay-up without batting an eye once the items are rung through the register.

Then, when the cashier asks if you have an "Extra Care" discount card, you probably shuffle your feet uncomfortably and avoid eye contact.

"Ah, I think I have one at home," you mumble almost incoherently.

After the bill is paid, you even beg off on a receipt.

Dudes, what a mistake!

Just recently, I got hip to the perks of the Extra Care card at CVS and the $$$ I can save for beer, a matinee ticket at an Art Film House, whatever!

For instance, a couple of days ago I used the discount card, and was the proud recipient of a coupon that offered up a whopping $2.79 off my next purchase of antiseptic mouthwash.

Just recently, I suffered through a painful root canal procedure at the dentist.

Needless to say, I am mindful now of taking special care of my mouth, and the precious environs within.

So, I snapped up that coupon without giving it a thought.

Imagine that!

After the discount, a medium-sized bottle of the zesty refreshing mouthwash, cost me a paltry 50 or so cents with taxes!

Saved a lot of moolah, eh?

Yesterday, I couldn't believe it when another purchase coughed up a coupon worth 2 free bucks!

Yup, cashola, without any strings attached.

A handful of items originally totalling $2.89 ended up costing me 89 cents.

There are other perks, too.

A customer racks up points whenever a sale is rung up that can be used toward future purchases at CVS.

What are 'ya waiting for?

Sign up now and save your first million.

It's clear sailing from there!

http://www.julianayrs.com

Fashion...may be injurious to your health! Quirky tips...

Today I was strolling through UCLA campus when I spied a gaggle of students queuing up for a free flu shot.

Because of a hectic schedule this past couple of weeks, I neglected to stop in for one at the local clinic.

Since CVS leases space to a qualified mini-clinic in their store on Westwood Blvd, I thought I'd stretch my legs a little and get a jab in the arm, before a nasty bout of the winter dregs descended on me.

As the technician prepared the vaccine, I noticed in their flyer that the nurse on duty was qualified to perform simple medical tasks which didn't require a Doctor's license.

I felt silly when a thought crossed my mind, but plunged ahead anyway.

"Can I ask you a dumb question," I asked hesitantly.

What's a person going to say to a silly request like that?

"Shoot!"

I prefaced my question by first noting that the medical affliction was a bizarre one.

Then, proceeded.

I pointed out that in the past couple of weeks - for some inexplicable reason - my belly-button (told you it was a zinger!) was swollen and sore to the touch.

"May I see it," she reacted without batting an eye.

When I lifted my tight-fitting "t" - designed by Abercrombie & Fitch (natch!) - I thrust out my less-than-toned stomach a tad so her keen eye could take a gander at the offending body part.

Her professional assessment jarred me!

The young beauty was familiar with the medical condition.

Whew, thank God!

In the back of my mind, I imagined that - just maybe - the doctor who delivered me screwed up at Toronto General a scant few decades ago (!) and I was just now suffering from the after-effects of a botched snip at the umbilical coil.

Just kidding!

The nurse noted that sometimes teen-age girls experience the same aggravating skin eruption when they wear tight jeans and hip-hugging shorts.

If the button (or buckle on a belt) is crafted in "nickel", she added, there may be an allergic reaction.

Have the Chinese slammed us once again with unsafe consumer products?

Recently, I purchased a couple of pairs of designer jeans, so her theory was conceivable! (no pun intended!)

"I recommend that girls take a bit of nail polish and swipe a bit on the side of the button next to the skin to prevent the problem from resurfacing."

A bit of make-up left-over from West Hollywood's Carnival would do the trick!

Long-term, though, I expect it may be a wise idea to snap up fashion outfits with plastic or bone buttons at the waistline, eh?

Either way, I trust I won't be sporting an unsightly mini-bump in the glorious ab zone of my 178 lb. frame - and likewise - scaring off potential dates next time I slip buck naked into the shower stall at the gym.

Blogging...fame! Oddballs come out of woodwork...

A few months ago, I noted that blogging foisted me reluctantly into the spotlight.

I never expected the phenomenon; after all, my profile shot is quite miniscule compared to the rest of the content on my blog site.

Unlike many post-it folks - my blog is not a vanity site - where I am inclined to splash a rash of publicity stills of moi across poorly-designed pages screaming out the obvious.

Me! Me! Me!

In view of the fact quite a few bloggers use monikers on the Internet, and cruise anonymously about the World-Wide-Web, maybe my modus operandi jars web surfer sensibilities a tad.

Golly, it's him in the flesh. He's a real person!

Of course, from the offset, I was keen to the fact that there were thousands of blogs out there vying for public consumption.


For this reason, I always endeavoured to offer up informative posts on topical subjects, a bit of social commentary, political news, and - oh my God - a dollop of celebrity dirt!!!

On occasion I walk the line - get a little outrageous - and the sh** hits the fan.

Maybe that's why people stare.

Dude, he said what?

Uh-huh.

A psychic foretold I'd be famous one day for "telling it like it is".

Well, maybe, that prediction has come to pass.

Yeah, the truth is hard to swallow, for some.

Maybe that's why all the eyes are focused on me now.

The other night, for instance, I waltzed into a movie theatre to catch a flick.

When I strode into the lobby - all the theatre-goers went silent - and acted like there was an elephant in the room.

On occasion when I stroll through The Abbey, too, jaws drop.

One night, I overheard a woman with her back to me, wonder aloud:

"What is everyone staring - "

At that moment, she half-turned and spied me over her shoulder strolling by.


Her voice trailed off - at which point - a dazed expression swept across her face.

At CVS when I stop in for a pomegranate Tea late at night - it's the only really good thirst quencher I know of in a pinch - the staff fumble around and make fools of themselves.

When I stroll up to the counter to pay, they totally lose it!

I want to utter up a tired old expression.

"Take a picture. It lasts longer."

The paparazzi wised up to that scenario a long time ago.

If I pop into the Internet Cafe to check e-mail, curious onlookers glance at my screen, ad nauseam.

Are they seeking lay-out tips or trying to get a scoop on my next sizzling post?

Meanwhile, I pretend not to notice the bizarre behaviour.

Now, it makes sense to me why celebrities react so negatively to fans and strangers when they're are out on-the-town for a respite from it all.

If a handful become recluses, it's easy to fathom why.

At times, the way people act, 'ya feel like you're from another planet.

Britney Spears must go through he** when she ventures out.

The creepy part has started, too.

Gawkers - with stalker tendencies - tend to lurk around when I am quietly having a light snack out-of-doors.

And, a strange character with an eerie light in his eye, pays too much attention when I occasionally dash down to the library for a book or two.

I hate to be rude, but judging from his odd-ball demeanor, it appears to be a better bet to take a wide berth.

On occasion, pedestrians and shoppers stop dead in their tracks, when I alight from my car.

There he is, they seem to be saying to themselves.

How can I capitalize on this chance encounter?

Lately, I've entered a new phase of my fame, too.

I used to hear people whisper behind my back:

"Do you know who that is?"

Then, there was a new line of query after that, for about a month or two.

"Do you know how old he is?"

At that juncture, curious spectators tended to surreptitiously inch forward a bit, to scrutinize for tell-tale signs of a nip 'n tuck here and there.

Nope, I haven't had any work done.

Not yet!

I expect that phrase three of my ten minutes of fame is on the rocky horizon.

When I'm in line at Starbucks, or Gelson's, I expect I'll hear astonished musings in an entirely different vein.

"Is he still alive?"

Yup, over my dead body!!!

Gelsons...cat food cheaper than CVS. Meow!

Mayfair Market used to be situated where Gelsons is now.

When I was ensconced in my cozy little apartment on Flores years ago, the corner market was just a hop-and-a-skip away, so I tended to shop there.

The staff were pleasant, the products were reasonably priced, and other shops were in walking distance if there was a need to pick up specialty items.

One of the perks included the occasional glimpse of singer Johnny Mathis or Streisand's son - Jason - squeezing fruit and vegetables in the produce department.

But, I moved, and started to shop at Pavilions.

Now that the Von's grocery is under construction, and temporarily shut-down, I have been forced to seek shopping-cart adventures elsewhere.

Last week, when I succumbed to a stray's whines, I was forced to dash into Gelsons for a can of cat food.

Not being a pet owner in a couple of years, I wasn't able to gauge the prices.



Nonetheless, they appeared to be within a reasonable range, so I plucked up a bit of the well-packaged attractive-looking stuff.



Shortly after "Gonzo" (a black two-year old with skit-zoid tendencies) gobbled down the last of it - I happened to be in the neighborhood of CVS - so I lurched in there on a gamble.

Surely, with their rock-bottom prices on Gatorade and Vitamin water, cat food would be inclined to hit the lower register, too.

Wrong!


On average, every pet food product on their well-stocked shelves, was about twenty-to-thirty cents more expensive than Gelsons.

'Ya got it.

I'm a regular at Gelsons, now.

Cruising ain't so bad, either!

Say, is that a banana in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?