Lindsay Lohan...punchy after fist in face! Star acted with grace...

You can have your cake & eat it, too!

(no matter what that twisted waitress thinks)

Footloose (well, not exactly with that ubiquitious ankle-bracelet) and fancifree - Lindsay Lohan sauntered out the front door of her home evening last - to celebrate her 24th birtday.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, LINDSAY!

As Kojak would say, we love 'ya baby!

But, not all things that go bump in the night, were in the mood to toast the femme-fatale out on her nightly par-tay-hearty Red Bull 'rounds.

At the oh-so-chic Voyeur Club (nestled alongside the French Market Place on the strip) the spoiled movie star - known to court a Judge or two on account of naughty social behaviour - was sent for a loop when a waitress out-of-the-blue stormed up and punched Ms. Lohan smack dab in the face.

Ouch.

Bitch-fight!

But, the head-strong young colt diffused a potentially ugly incident, when she acted with restraint.

Instead of slapping back, or calling the cops to file assault charges, Ms. Lohan handled the unpleasant encounter with Grace.

That's classy!

That's right, you hold your head high, girl!

That screwball babe was just lookin' for publicity - and in the final analysis - an opportunity to link to your fame.

She's a "twisted wacko lipstick-lesbo" with the hots for you.

Talk about sicko!

They don't call Tinsel Town "Hollyweird" for no good reason!

Oh, by the way, many happy returns!

What now?

http://www.julianayrs.com/

Beyonce...cat fight with Etta James! Meow...

Do 'ya think its natural?

Etta James is going to whup Beyonce butt.

Shortly after the dumpy warbler stormed the stage at a gig in Seattle this past week, she was all primed up and at-the-ready to spew venom at the pretty young chanteuse, too.

Allegedly, James was annoyed with the airhead singer because she had the audacity to bellow out the standard - "At Last" - at the President's Neighbourhood Ball a couple of weeks ago.

Since James first belted out the smoldering tune in 1961, it has become a sort-of signature song for her repertoire of hits.

"The great Beyoncé," James wickedly muttered to herself.

"I can't stand Beyoncé. She has no business up there, singing up there on a big ol' president day, gonna be singing my song that I've been singing forever."

Then, the over-the-hill performer proceeded to knock the president, too.

"You guys know your president, right? You know the one with the big ears?" she ranted before a shocked audience.


"Wait a minute, he ain't my president. He might be yours; he ain't my president. But I tell you that woman he had singing for him, singing my song - she's going to get her a** whipped."

Beyonce is such a little sprig of a thing, just betcha old flubber-face would snap the popular young Diva in two, eh?

As to Etta's performance, well, one critic put it this way.

"James celebrated her successes Wednesday night at the Paramount Theatre, arriving on stage in a motorized wheelchair. The blues, R&B, soul and jazz diva's seven-song set seemed less a concert than a victory lap around her remarkable career, and it began on an audacious note with a "Come to Mama" moment."

"The sublime "I'd Rather Go Blind" and "I Want to Ta Ta You, Baby" were similarly, well, horny, mixing sex and sax (and trumpet and trombone)."

"The randy edge helped James over a few rough spots, as did her eight-strong Roots Band and, on a sing-a-long version of "Piece of My Heart," with a vocally enthusiastic audience."

As to singing at the White House in the future?

After the acid comments she earmarked for the PREZ, it is doubtful she'll be able to wangle an invitation at any tony soiree in Washington in the near future - unless she claps her yap, shut - of course!

Well, 'ya know what they say about blonds.

Just magnify that a tad.

After all, a bottle-blond-black, is an awesome oddity to fathom, or behold!

Girl, we'll see about that!

http://www.julianayrs.com